Updated: Oct 14
When we are avoiding emotional issues we can stay extremely busy and the emotions can't break through. If we are so busy and so focused on other things we don't have any opportunity for our minds to process the feelings that we are avoiding. Eventually they(feelings) begin to seep in. We call these emotional intrusions. These intrusions can hinder our memory, our learning ability and our concentration.
Without being actively aware of this, we keep from facing ourselves. Many people, particularly women, stay focused on other people and continue to stuff all the emotions they are feeling.
We say that we have no 'me time' but for the most part we never allow ourselves true' me time' because it can be scary and painful. Who does want to think about emotional pain if we can avoid it? This is a typical response but if we don't deal with these feelings they keep building.
BUT If we ignore these feelings they don't go away, they grow. They grow into things that get our attention. Some people will begin to have physical symptoms; stomachaches, headaches, fatigue etc. The body tries to get us to call attention to these feelings. As we continue to ignore them the pressure builds. In some people the mind begins to falter; with memory issues, trouble finding words, concentrating or learning new material. It gets to the point, if you continue to ignore the emotions, that some people may even believe they might have a brain tumor or having a stroke because it affects them so much. The willingness for us to believe it could just be pressure because we are avoiding emotions is low. Most people cannot believe that our minds can perpetrate such a crime against us.
So, okay, you may need to deal with some issues or feelings, how do you do this? The very 1st thing to do is have downtime. The quiet time with no distractions maybe meditation, maybe yoga or maybe just sitting quietly. The thoughts will come flooding in. Your 1st instinct will be to push them away and fill your mind with happy or distracting thoughts. Don't. Allow the thoughts to come free-form and watch them roll through, without you directing them. Eventually they will slow down and a pattern will emerge.
Allow the feelings and emotions to wave over you; cry, scream or deal physically with these feelings. You may find it helpful to write your feelings down. You may find it helpful to draw them or use other creative means. You may find yourself wanting to talk to a counselor. You might consider searching for a book on the topic that seems to be emerging as a pattern in your mind.